Altering the mindset- i wish into how?

A lot of the times in class I find myself saying “this would be a lot easier if I were bigger or stronger”, “I wish I had the flexibility to do this technique better” things like that, just pointing out all the skills I don’t have and wishing that I did. What I failed to realize is the more I say these things to myself, the more difficult it seems to reach. By simply stating the words “I wish”, I am implying that they are goals I am not able to achieve, and the more I dream about obtaining those skills instead of working towards them, the further they go from my reach. This is when I realized I had to start changing my mindset. Asking myself, “how can I achieve this?” instead of “why can’t I do this?”. By changing my words into a plan, I am changing my wishes into goals, and goals into action. Coming up with ways to better myself for certain forms, techniques, kicks and punches. Dreaming is healthy, and fantasizing about being better at something is only human, but it’s when you actually start taking actions that they begin to turn into reality. This is a mindset I try to carry throughout my daily life, in everything that I do. Everytime I catch myself wishing something were different, I try to think of all the steps I can take to walk towards that goal. 

The Struggle to get Moving

Throughout the day, I’m always thinking about what I want to do later. My plans for the day are often more important than my present task, and yet when it comes to the time where I am actually able to act on these plans, I struggle to find the motivation to do so. I mean, being productive is only fun when you’re not actually doing it, and it’s a lot easier to think about than to actually do it. Today I was so excited to get home from school because I had a whole list of things I was going to do, I was going to clean my room, make a huge lunch, write in my bullet journal, make some jewelry then head over to the gym. Yea.. I didn’t do any of that. Instead I told myself “I deserve a break” then went over to the fridge, grabbed a huge slice of pie and watched netflix for 5 hours. Because obviously I needed a break from the extra long weekend I just had. The worst part is, I didn’t even enjoy it. I never do. The only thing that I get out of chillaxing the day away is guilt and regret, and a stomach full of processed sugars and fat. Great. Fortunately however, writing this has made me recognize this problem, and now I’m  actually gonna get my butt moving and do my best to prepare for tomorrow, because as always, I have a whole list of things I want to do tomorrow, but this time I’m actually gonna do it. I recognize now that the feeling I get from the end of a productive day is a lot more rewarding than the feeling of shame, and  pins and needles in my legs from sitting all day. 

The point is; when all we think about is the future, then we forget that we are living in the present. I often forget that I am living in the moment, and I can do literally whatever I want right now. I forget to think about my intentions within the smallest parts of my day that often seem so insignificant to me, and yet, it's the small things that determines whether it was a successful day or not. Living in the moment can mean two different things to me; it can mean recognizing my ability to make my day worth it, or it can mean giving into temptation and falling to unhealthy habits. Right now, I'm tryna master the first one. I guess what I need is balance.  A balance between planning for the future, and living in the present to take action. And when I say planning for the future, I mean constructing a realistic plan and recognizing how I can complete it, not just make a whole list of things I wanna do and hope I do it. But now that I've taken the time to really analyze my failed day, I've learned that one good thing has come out of this; a lesson. And now I know not to inhale a massive piece of pie and sink into the couch for 5 hours. 

So here’s to tomorrow, because it’s bound to be a lot more successful than today.

Taking Initiative

 

Another year has gone by, and as always, I think it is important to acknowledge my accomplishments of 2021  before moving forward, one of which would be my ability to gather enough courage to put myself out there and learn a new skill- Kung Fu! With this, I understand I am stepping onto a new path, a challenging yet rewarding journey that will (and has already) change my life and way of thinking. After quitting dance 4 years ago, I found it difficult to scrape up enough motivation to continue with a healthy lifestyle, to the point where I fell into very unhealthy and frankly quite dangerous habits. With no reason to stay active, it felt as though all my physical strength had been lost. This, of course, significantly affected me emotionally as well, looking at myself and seeing nothing but a weak, fragile, empty vessel. It wasn’t until mid 2021 that I decided to take initiative, and actually do something to change this. I figured if I didn’t make a change now, when would I? Not only have I started gaining my confidence back, I have been making small yet crucial steps to becoming the person I’ve always wanted to be. 2021 was the year that I recognized my potential. I looked into myself after all those years and told myself “just do it!!”. And now, I am putting myself out there and working harder than ever. In the Year of The Tiger, I will continue taking initiative, moving forward and never looking back.